Today I am quite worse.
Last days have been awful. Yesterday I not went with Tere to the beach, and neither do I.
I am not able to go out home, besides, my daughter again treated me with a big contempt yesterday evening  and so that I am as down than I couldn’t cope with this. Anything makes me fall down in the sudden.
I don’t have still enough strength to deal with problems.

Though I haven’t got to the beach, I got up early to take my dog for a walk. I like sitting on a bank where the shadow refresh me to write a little. Writing is the only scape to me thoughts  that I have found so far. When shops are open I will go to buy pens and a notebook to start studying English  from now on, and I do a diary schedule, with easy tasks and open to my state. In this moment anxiety and discouragement is greater to me, but I must win them.

Today at long last, I  have been organizing how I am going to study English and even I have even reviewed lesson 1.
I will try to give a ride and to review to  the next exam in the mornings and to write on my blog, read other things and watch some video in English in the afternoon.
English is the only couple that have never abandoned me, or rather, i did not abandon it, despite difficult times.

My life that has no sense, and how always against everything.

At the moment in which I have no illusion, appears the dog Kira and little by little it is gaining my heart, and although I understand that it is not comfortable to have an animal on a floor and my are who was going to take care of it does not, but I am doing yo and receipt so much affection by her and I think that is helping me to get out more and get up each mana nothing.Now comes the big problem that my daughter hates it. In a way, I can understand her, since she makes pee wherever she can, is so affectionate that leans on top of everybody , even of my daughter and her friends and Kira does not understand that Alba does not want that it approaches. Kira goes up in the armchairs, beds, table, always stuck to us because is un animal that need much affection and although I try to educate her, my forces are now minimal. The friends of my daughter don’t want to come home because of fearing kira and even me sometimes also feel overwhelming, maybe kirs is too active to being in a flat,  but on the other hand, kira has a look so endearing that it makes me feel that someone cares about me and needs me, even if it is an animal.

My life, as always complicated. I can not even enjoy quietly of Kira.

Tere has come to give the pills to me. Tere is charming.

by Dream’Espe
19/06/2016

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