This afternoon I  was so bad,  that I couldn’t stand the idea of keep alive, and even I was devising the way of doing it, if jump from a bridge, if buy the pills in the Pharmacy a and then  take them in the field, far front my town and stay therrr until I die.

Sorry for who love me, but I can’t bearr it anymore, and the treatment that I have is not doing its effect or its too much slow.

Seeing that it was impossible to control me, I went to the emergency where  the doctor told me that it should go to the psychiatrist at hospital so he would  decide if should  increase my medication or maybe I must be admitted in the hospital, because the solution is not to sleep me to not think.

Finally I been injecting relaxing, but the next time this happens, I should go to the hospital for that  a psychiatrist be who decide.

It is very hard to say to someone, I want to die, help me!

What curious is life, this morning my practitioner has prescribed me a travel, that I must do obligatory,  don’t mind if I feel like it or not, and this afternoon,  another doctor wanted to send me to the hospital.

Life and death fix in me. The worst , i believe that death will win at the end.

Now I’m  going to sleep, anxieties injection are doing effect.

– by Dreams’Espe


One thought on “Diary 21/06/2016

  1. Please keep looking for help. Sometimes its hard to see what our purpose is – God knows this is my struggle, as well – but there is something, and eventually it should all make sense.
    I think it’s good that you are considering the doctor’s advice, and continue to do so for now.

    Liked by 2 people

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